Bad Blogger!

I'm late with my blog......again. In my defense, I just didn't write one.

For the last couple of weeks I have been struggling. With a lot of things, not just my weight. The fact that I have to deal with weight issues in addition to all the other things is just the icing on the cake.

I decided that this time around I would talk about failing. It happens and not letting it affect you so that you keep failing, well, that's the thing.

I have been fat my whole life and I am an emotional eater. I've talked about this before. One of my biggest challenges is stopping all the bad behaviors, the "fat girl" behaviors. When my emotions come into play in any form, I eat. If I'm happy I eat to celebrate, if I'm angry or sad I eat to console myself. Good news, I eat. Bad news, I eat. So when things go wrong, as they did these last couple of weeks, my instinct is to eat.

The problem these last couple of weeks was that my car was in the shop for over two weeks. During that two weeks my well thought out and executed gym routine fell apart. Suffice it to say that while I did not abandon all my good work, I did make some poor choices. The good part is that even the poor choices were not as bad as the ones I'd make a year ago. So that's good, right?  I know that I should have reverted back to the Comcast fitness videos, but I did not. So, the food choices I made were worse because I did not exercise. Quite frankly, I felt sorry for myself. A lot.

The good thing during this whole time was that although I made some bad choices, I never lost sight of what I needed to do. I never forgot that I was in this for the long haul. Each and every time I meet a hurdle I keep kicking that fat girl off to the curb. I'll keep kicking her until she stays in the background, cowed, forever. She's not going to win again.

Oh, and I finally got my car back. The first place I went was the gym. Did you hear that, I WENT TO THE GYM! I got back right where I needed to be and didn't look back. I didn't attack myself about the failures and I didn't ignore them either. I just let them stay in my past and went to the gym.

I kept my focus.

Next week's blog will be a surprise (because I haven't decided what to write about yet. Don't judge.)

See you next time!

Diva